you know those blinding moments of OMFG clarity where you realise that 'this is how it is' and probably always will be ? sudden realizations that synchronize with other events happening both in and outside ones sphere of influence...
...one of the latest a couple weeks ago was when my lady inititated a full time career of the 40hr a week variety, meaning i had to take up the slack with the kids, and by kids i'm talking the full range, from hormonally charged teenagers of both sexes to just at school, pre school and toddler, all needing lunches, dinners, cleaned, clothed, entertained and transported to various places for education and recreational purposes
the epiphany was, i'm probably going to be doing this for at least the next 15 years. it was one of those 'job for life' moments when you realise the job you have or the career path you chose has now chosen you and theres no escape...
...the hardest part has been resetting my body clock and natural rhythm to accomodate the significant others, the rest is just planning and logistics, the drudgery of routine that must bore the shit out of any process worker stuck in a crap factory job...getting up, getting fed, getting to work, getting the job done then getting back to to bed...blah blah blah
truth be told...i LOVE it! It has presented me with an opportunity to evolve and grow into the person i want to be in my coming age of leisure, to cultivate hobbies and pastimes which i never had the time for but also to put them on a timeline that requires no pressure to learn or succeed in and i'm lucky enough to be living in place of natural wonder and beauty such that i'm inspired to actually do it...
in the meantime i'm growing and ocassionally killing/eating our own chickens but otherwise collecting their eggs, the buzz of which is equivalent to downloading a just released 320 bit album. i mean its free and it gives sooo much pleasure as you savour and devour it. free range eggs taste wayyy better as free music sounds wayyy better:) and when used to bake with, which i have also taken to, the results are divine...
...apparently the fish are starting to run in the channel across the paddock and the eels are stirring at the stream down the end of our drive
so i'm gonna have to learn how to catch and feed us there too, cant freaking wait...mmmm yummmmmm
i'm also developing my green thumb, having planted some veges in 'my nightmare before christmas' garden, so named because its fenced in by an old recycled, faded and chipped white picket fence lashed together with black cord and held up by rusted metal stakes. i'll get around to taking a photo of it one day cos it looks like it should be a burial ground for dead cuddly toys...
...then i've got my industrial sewing machines, my screen printing plant so maybe i'll resurrect my clothes label. ive got my puter, speakers and internet so maybe i'll make tunes again and resurrect my record label. i've got my camera which i'm still learning how to use and once the littlest starts at pre school i'll have the time to take on part time study so the opportunities are limitless. maybe i'll learn how to write nasty code and hack the fuck out of some shit sites or maybe crash the banks and start a revolution or maybe i'll learn how to weld and cast metal cos i've alsways wanted to make steel art and furniture or maybe kick my creative writing steez into full effect and write/illustrate a kids book
who knows ? but i suppose most importantly, i have the opportunity to affect and influence my childrens development in the most positive manner and revel in their company for they are my most treasured things...
BTW that first pic is the view from my lounge looking straight out as i type, its what i see on any ordnary day, the last is the view out my lounge side window and dedicated to all my playas in the hood, both real and virtual who are stuck in the daily grind of the big smoke...live long and prosper otherwise eat ya heart out :P
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